Semiresponsive's not just a state of being...

Show us something that is standing in your way.

Me

But only sometimes.  :)

TMI Tuesday

1. Is there a TV show you HAVE to watch? If so, what is it? There are several that I'm pretty into but thanks to network television putting the shows online there aren't any I feel I need to rush home for.  But I love Men In Trees.

2. What is you favorite drink if you are going to drink more than one? Alcoholic drinks?  Red Snappers - that's Crown, Amaretto and Cranberry Juice

3. How long do you carry guilt around with you? It depends on what I'm feeling guilty for.  Generally, until I resolve it somehow by talking to the person or dealing with it internally.

4. Where is or would be your number one romantic get away spot? Honestly it's not a destination.  Just me and my honey somewhere away from people and cell service where we can just be us without outside influences.

5. Have you ever seen a counselor? Yeah - I've been in school for a long time!

Bonus (as in optional): Last summer the Archives of Sexual Behavior the 237 reasons people have sex and the Top 50 Reasons Men and Women Have Sex. What are your top 5 reasons?

I don't really have a top five reasons, but here are 5 good reasons to have sex:

1. It's fun.

2. It feels good.

3. It's a way to connect with my partner.

4. It makes him happy.

5. It makes me feel desirable.

Play along!

Okay, so I'm thinking that I don't understand the concept of love.  Or, perhaps it's that I'm not as quick to trust the emotion.  This is prompted by the knowledge that my father passed away nine months ago and since that time my stepmother's been in relationships with two men (short relationship the first and the second has just started) who claim to love her, be one with her, find her to be their soul mate.  What's up with this?

It's certainly not jealousy on my part - not at this point anyway.  I'm happy doing whatever the hell I'm doing with the person I'm dating.  I think I'm largely happy because I'm not trapped under the oppressiveness that comes along with "I love you, you're part of me, I'm part of you, you're my soul mate."  That's a damn lot of pressure.

But here's what's getting me about the whole situation with my stepmother: how can you find two people in the span of nine months (four of which she spent not dating) that say you're their other half?  Are older people (and by older I don't mean old - she's in her early 50's and the guys were in their late 40's and early 60's respectively) more apt to assign those feelings to a relationship?  Is it that you get less guarded as you go on?  Or, am I the weird one finding that I like having that guard up?

Also, part of me is sort of upset that she moved from a 20 year relationship with my father saying the last year of his life that she'd never date again because she couldn't find anyone who loved her the way daddy did to two "in love" style relationships.  I know I shouldn't be and it's her life, but I am.  I think it primarily stems from me not understanding this current concept of love and it being something that you just run into sort of willy nilly like. 

Thoughts?

I'm not sure why but this song has really struck a chord with me lately.

I know I said I loved you but I'm thinking I was wrong,
I'm the first to admit that I'm still pretty young,
and I never meant to hurt you when I wrote you ten love songs.
but a guy that I could never get 'cause his girlfriend was pretty fit
and everyone who knew her loved her so.
and I made you leave her for me and now I'm feeling pretty mean,
but my mind has fucked me over more times than any man could ever know.

Maybe I should give up, give in,
give up trying to be thin,
give up and turn into my mother,
god knows I love her.

and I'm sorry to which ever man should meet my sorry state,
watch my steady lonesome gait and beware.
I would never love a man 'cause love and pain go hand in hand
and I can't do it again.

So we stayed up late one night to try and get our problems right,
but I couldn't get into his head just what was going through my mind,
and I think he knew where I was going 'cause he put Ryan Adams on I think he thinks it makes me weak but it only ever makes me strong.
I've got this friend who sounds just like him,
now he's the man I'd leave you for, the man that I just adore like you.
The same man, he turns to me he said I've got to tell you how i feel,
if god could make the perfect girl for me it would be you
and my god told me not tell about how much do you love your fella?"
I don't know more everyday
not in this new romantic way.

I'll always be your first love, you'll always be my first love.

and I'm sorry to which ever man should meet my sorry state
watch my steady lonesome gait and beware,
I would never love a man 'cause love and pain go hand in hand
I would never love a man cause I could never hurt a man, not in this new romantic
way.

Okay, I have some problems with another relationship article.  I really think I should stop reading them.  Here's my biggest problem with them: they imply that men are all the same and pretty one-dimensional.  I'll admit that perhaps men aren't great with the emotions and perhaps even they don't feel things the same way we do but culture has taught us how to react to situations, right?  Still, not all men are sports-watching, beer guzzling, don't-read, can't-have-a-conversation lumps of flesh that a lot of the articles make them out to be.

This particular article has to do with the 5 types of dates guys will not want to go on.  And it's pretty emphatic that men period will not want to go on these dates.  Evidently the writer (a man) has forgotten that there are exceptions to every rule.

Date #1 - Hiking.  Evidently men don't want to go hiking because there are only so many flowers one can smell and only so many sunsets one can watch.  Also, there's not sports television or Internet access.  Here are a couple of things I have learned: 1) Wifi is in almost everything!  Nearly everyone has some way to access the Internet remotely and many of us from our cell phones.  In the event that something cataclysmic happens and he needs access to the Internet I'm betting that can happen; 2) There are quite a few men that given the choice to go outside and hike around and see the sites or sit at home and rehash the same old conversations or watch television would much rather be hiking.  And, not all men are married to the boob tube. 

Date #2 - Opera.  Okay, I'll halfway give the author this one.  But, there are some men who enjoy the opera.  And there are some men who, while they may not particularly love the opera, are willing to sit through it politely because they like the woman who asked them to go.  Not all men are Neanderthals who don't know how to behave in public.

Date #3 - Travel.  This one isn't so much laid out as a date as it is a complaint that women on dating sites all say they like to travel.  The article states that men don't like to travel because their work piles up while they're away and their boss discovers that the office (or whatever) can run smoothly without them.  Okay, did this writer suddenly forget that most women work now too?  Our work piles up when we're away also, but that doesn't mean we don't like to see places and expand our horizons.  Oh, also it's expensive.  My guess is if you've been dating someone long enough to travel with the you've likely worked out the fine kinks of finance.  Neither one of you are likely footing the whole bill for this excursion.

Date #4 - Clothes Shopping.  Who on earth is this man dating?  Do women really take men on dates where they're forced to hold purses and wait while the ladies shop?  Give me a break.  I've been around for a little while now and I've never heard a girl tell me that she found this great new guy and for their first date she's taking him to the mall so he can watch her try on clothes.  Yeah.  Mhmm.  Actually, I can't think of any time, new dating or old relationship where I heard of that referred to as a date.  Do we sometimes force our men to go shopping with us?  Trust us guys - as rarely as humanly possible.

Date #5 - Relationship Workshops.  You know, based on this guy's article I wouldn't be at all surprised if his girlfriends had repeatedly drug him to relationship workshops.  But, be that as it may, I can agree that maybe this isn't the most fun date, but how many women color it up like that?  "Okay honey, get in the car.  I've got a great date planned for us tonight.  A relationship workshop!" 

Well now I'm sufficiently peeved for the day.  I hate the implication that men and women are incapable of relating to each other.  Stuff like this feeds stereotypes that just aren't broadly true once you enter into your mid-twenties.  Well, and if you live outside L.A.

Ctrl-V (PCs) or Command-V (Macs) Time! Paste whatever text you copied last.

Grandma's newly refinished table

Phew! I was worried...

;-)

Show us your mother.

Mom & Mack

I find this to be quite creepy.  I'm not sure why - but I think it's because sometimes when she gets going it's hard to tell her back from her front...

3x Thursday: 05/08/y2k+8: Upcoming Plans

1. What plans do you have for the upcoming weekend?  I've got a housewarming party and a birthday part on Saturday, Mother's Day plans with my grandmother Sunday and an outdoor concert Sunday night (but that part may or may not happen).

2. Do you have any major plans for the summer? Not really.  Mostly work.  I've got a couple of friends getting married this summer.

3. If money was no object, is there would something you'd like to do/somewhere you'd like to go/etc? If so, what is it? If not, are you happy with the way things are?  I don't know that I'm necessarily happy where I am but right now I'm not sure where I'd go or what I'd do.

 

Booking Through Thursday

Writing guides, grammar books, punctuation how-tos . . . do you read them? Not read them? How many writing books, grammar books, dictionaries–if any–do you have in your library?

I love reading about how words are misused.  I do have a punctuation guide that is my friend.  :)  I've got about 4 or 5 "writing" books.

 

Thirsty Thursday: Share you Worst Culinary Disaster

That would have to be the time I set myself on fire in culinary school.  I was frying something and splashed oil onto myself over and open flame.  The oil ignited and so did my pants.  I dropped trou in the kitchen faster than you would have thought possible!

 

Thursday Challenge - Family

 

Cassie, me and David Dec 2000

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thursday Threesome

::Fife and Drum?::

Onesome: Fife-- Barney? ...a musical instrument? ...the number after 'four'? What came to mind when you saw this week's title?

The instrument.  I used to play one in my High School ROTC Drum and Fife Corps.  :)

Twosome: and--do you recall a painting of a fife and drum set with a flag? No? Maybe one of our American History majors can link it in...

Maybe sort of, but not off hand.  Is that awful?

Threesome: Drum--lines? Do you love them? ...or do you even know they exist? I'm wondering if this is an "Eastern" thing...

Oh, I love drum lines!  I played on one of those in high school too.  All hail the Xylophone!

Show us your favorite tool.
Submitted by Maraschino.

two different screwdrivers

I've discovered in my time being a single gal that I can do without a lot of tools - but not without a screwdriver.  Just ask my old vacuum that would always get clogged, that metal grate that covers my air return & filter, the wobbly dining room chair, etc...